"What's Your Problem With GOD?"

My friend always keeps asking me, What’s your problem with God? 

Each time, I wave. Let it go, I say. Then, one day I decide that I will tell him all about it. 

I come to his place. He points a gun at me and asks again. I say, that is precisely what I came here for. He then, asks me to sit down and I sit down. 

Still pointing his gun at me, he walks closer. When you are close enough, the probability of shooting right on target becomes one. He asks me, why do you not believe in God?

I gulp down a mouthful of spit and say, it’s a choice and I chose not to. Then, he starts pushing the gun into my mouth. 

I say, I cannot speak with the gun in my mouth and he says, what. I gesture with my finger and he moves the gun away. Why do I have to believe in God, I ask. 

You have to because whether you believe in God or not, He is the supreme most power, he shouts. I ask in a cool voice, when I don’t believe HIM, how does he become the supremest power? He gets worked up again. Don’t mess with me, he screams. 

I ask him, who told you about God? He thinks for a while and then says, everyone. I stare at him and he probes himself a little more and then says, my mother. I smile and ask, who told her? 

He raises the gun again. Actually, its a pistol. 

Probably, her mother...my grand mother, he says. I ask him the same question over and over again. Who told her?

He then freaks out. What’s the point you are getting at? He screams kicking the chair he was sitting on. I say, all I am asking is how did that first person ever know that God is there. He thinks for a while and says, probably he read somewhere. 

Where?

I don’t know, he shouts. Ok, if he read somewhere then somebody must have written it. Who told the person who wrote it? I ask.

He pulls down his chair again and sits down. Either, he knew it himself or somebody must have told him or God himself told him, he says. He then adds, all this better add up to something or else I will empty this gun into your mouth and you will bleed like a... 

He pauses and thinks. I ask, bleed like a what? 

He says, I don’t know. 

I say, Ok. Consider this. What if the first guy who told about God, told a lie?

He asks me, why would he?

I say, I don’t know. 

Just then, I recollected a teacher of mine and her small yet moving discourse on God.

How many of you believe in God? She asked and the entire class jumped on its feet. We were probably in our sixth class. 

Oh! So everyone does. Can somebody tell me why?

Nobody did. I had an answer but I refrained because I thought it was silly.

Ok. Not a problem. How many of you believe that air exists?  Again, all hands went up and again she asked the same question. This time, the entire class shouted in unison, “Because even though we cannot see the air we can feel it.”

Very good. Now can you see God? 

One kid stood up and said yes. In the photo frames at my home in the puja room and in temples.

Our teacher called him a bright kid. I felt jealous. I too had the same answer in mind.

Listen kids, I have a very interesting story to tell. 

Pin drop silence.

Once upon a time, their lived a man named God. God lived in troubled times when people killed each other for food and people began to fear each other. The most powerful was the most feared and he exploited their fear. So, God came up with this story and told a shepherd about it. God told the shepherd that there is a supreme power that created everything on Earth and that it would punish all the men who kill or steal food, that it would help the good hard working people and that it was the supreme most and no body could challenge it and if any one did, it destroyed them. The shepherd liked the story as it gave him Hope. He told the story to one of the men who tried to steal food from him. The thief Feared the story was true for he knew what he was doing was wrong. The most powerful once ordered the thief to steal for him. The thief refused and narrated him the story and he became Humble as he was convinced that their was someone more superior than him and more importantly no body wanted to take any chances. One night, when the shepherd was telling the story to his grandchildren, they asked him who told him about the story and he replied, “GOD himself!” 

Many years later, many more versions of the story arose. Few people became merchants of the story and spread it to distant lands but told the story as they liked. Soon, the original story was lost. 

Hungry artists drew pictures and merchants sold them as Gods. Soon, a million Gods were born. Merchants then built various kinds of buildings and placed God in them. Merchants then began to sell wishes and forgiveness for their sins in and out of these buildings in various forms. Life then changed. Everything became simple. Every sin could be committed and then a forgiveness be bought. Laziness could be afforded with a little money to buy wishes. Life then became competitive as these merchants grew by the day. A too simple life then turned complicated. With nothing more to do with God, these merchants started pitching one God over the other and the loyalists of these merchants began to war and kill each other without any Fear for they believed they were fighting for God and how could God punish somebody who is fighting for him? All those families whose men and women were killed kept losing Hope and strength for God himself became the reason for their despair. The, finally a day came when God lost all meaning. 

I was angered by the story and shot my arm up and asked, “How do you know all this?”

My teacher smiled. She said to all the children pointing her finger to me, do this. 

Everybody shouted in unison again, “Do what?”

Question! Question everything you hear or read. That is the single most important thing in life and with a sigh, she added, Today you kids learnt the greatest lesson of your life.

Now, I cannot recollect who that teacher was or what she taught us or what her name was. It probably doesn’t matter as long as I remember what she said. 

So, you think you are f***** clever and that you proved that God does not exist? He screams till his vocal chords hurt and I come out of my memory land.

I reply, I never said God does not exist. May be he does, may be doesn’t. All I am saying is that why not question it, instead of following blindly.

He screams again and I put my palms to my ears but, could still hear him.

What’s the point when you can’t say for sure whether God exists or not?

I smile. He wonders. I keep smiling. He keeps wondering and the gun slips out of his hand. I mean the pistol. I bend over and he thinks, I will pick it up and makes a quick move to reach it first. But, I don’t. 

I then say, this is why. This is why!